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Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Yoga Tuesdays

Today was a good day despite the awkward and sometimes uncomfortable positions I contorted myself into for yoga. It had been 3 weeks since I attended a session. I was eager to go again but wondered how my body would feel about it tomorrow! Time will tell. :-/ It was difficult today for me but that is all forgotten in the growing twilight and the approaching dawn. (See Next Chapter for reference.)

It was good to chat with the person I carpool with; and when I arrived, there were a couple of other ladies who greeted me and welcomed me back! It put a smile on my face. :-) I'm beginning to be known. No dates were set up for coffee, not even close to that kind of connection, but it's a start.

As we began the session lying on our mats, I had a hard time focusing on my breathing -- "being in the present moment because it is the only moment." Nevertheless, I was very content!

Monday, January 28, 2013

Next Chapter


A new day is dawning. Of course the dawn, or sunrise, does not happen in a moment's time. Twilight comes first with no actual sighting of the sun. I perhaps feel (rather than see) the first signs of twilight. Was it so dark before? No, I wouldn't say dark, instead I'd say nondescript. There's been no depression, grumblings or even mild discontent. I've been happy, even. But I think, at least for me, it takes a surprisingly long time to turn the page - finishing one chapter to then start another.

I'm not sure where this story is headed. Do you always know about your story? Although none of us are in control of life, I refer to the general direction. Just today the last of our house guests left for their respective homes. For a time we had two very different worlds collide. Not in a volatile sense! Different worlds literally, but they were also very different parts of my world, or my story. Now that the house has returned to just Brian and I. I'm somewhat philosophical or contemplative. Unfortunately neither of these worlds are part of my daily life now. My world's geographical point of reference is now Florida. However, my story has not really begun here. This concerns Brian in regard to my health and well-being. We women need our relational outlet with other women.

I have learned over my lifetime that rushing things (or people) doesn't really work. I might feel a sense of urgency to do something, get a task accomplished; but my timing isn't always the best. Oh, I'm not saying that if I push through and do something like order a needed item, book a ticket, etc. there are disastrous results. However, the times that I do "go with the flow" (not overly stress about the to do list and accomplishment) I have found, for example, sometimes the price is better when ordering or the timing of the trip would have conflicted with another event coming up. Not always but sometimes.

Most of all I can't "accomplish" relationships. They take time. I do need to be in situations that allow me to meet people. That being said, I don't want to rush into groups and join this or that. I go to a yoga class once a week, although yoga is not about chit chat! And I've signed up for a small group which lasts 3 months, for the gospel according to Dr. Seuss. We will see. Rome was not built in a day. Nor are heart attachments! Nevertheless, the twilight will progress to an actual dawning because my story continues!

Sunday, January 06, 2013

My Approach to the New Year

It's Saturday morning, the first Saturday of the new year. Of course I've already explained my feelings about this time of the week, brilliantly entitled - Saturday Mornings! I've finished my first cup of coffee, read some and reflected a bit. Although I've wanted to write these past few weeks, time and circumstances didn't allow me to sit down and actually accomplish this desire. So, we have some catching up to do!

I hope your holiday season was a good one. Unfortunately, I realize this is not always true for everyone. I'm sorry if that was the case for you. Family dynamics, financial instability, expectations and past echos can wreak havoc on our emotions, particularly during the holidays. Let alone tragedies can happen at any time of year. I'm becoming aware of how I can subtly project my circumstances, reactions and emotions on to others or even groups of people. A small example would be that since I live in Florida now, I can find it difficult to remember that much of the world is experiencing winter. I look out my window... it's sunny and should reach around 80 degrees today.

At any rate, my holidays were probably typical fare. That's not to say I didn't enjoy them! Getting together with family is not only important but fun. (The traveling I could have done without but that's beside the point.) There were a couple of bumps along the road - overwhelmed at times, not feeling well, and miscommunications, but these are part of life. What I loved was spending time with people I see so infrequently.

The new year stretches before us, filled with promise and hopeful expectations. Needless to say, I don't really know what's going to happen, nor am I in control of it! I've not made any grand resolutions. Any goals I have are pretty simple. Two things I would like to see happen (resolutions ?) are: 1) I become more of a reader again. Somehow I've let computers take too much of my time and I want to take some of it back for reading. 2) I'm giving myself a year to get fully settled in the new house. I hate to admit it but we left California (having lived there 3.5 years) without having unpacked a few boxes - ever! So, I'd like to unpack, buy what's needed, paint and decorate. This last goal doesn't seem ambitious to some, perhaps most, but it has been problematic for me in the past.

I don't want a huge agenda hanging over my head. Too many things take place without any plan, whether it be a surprise, spontaneity or just plain out of my control, so I want to be flexible. (For example, it's now Sunday afternoon and I'm finally finishing this post which started yesterday!) I am finding, the simple and very often small choices and activities can bring the greatest joy, impact and/or peace.

Of course, I'm not a type A person, more like a type A-. :-) Therefore many people will not be able to relate with me! That's OK - go for the gusto, A types! We need all kinds of people for this world to function. I'm looking forward to 2013. I hope you are too.