The Search for a Community

There are all kinds of community. A person might even be a part of a number of communities at one time. This particular activity of searching for a church community has never been my favorite. I'm not a good "shopper" in this regard. It takes so much time, but some group gatherings fit better than others so the effort can be worth it.
We've tried four different groups, two more extensively. We have decided on the church we went to first. I was going to write "we have settled on..." but I want to write about this process in a more positive light! Going back to church has not been high on my priority list. I've been rather disappointed by the last two communities I've gone to. One of those churches I attended for three and a half years. That length of time and other factors made my disappointment quite profound.
Nevertheless, intellectually I have always been convinced of the need and potential blessing of community life. But my emotional response has been clouded by the hurt and subsequent disillusionment which occurred within the confines of this structure. People are people, which includes the possibility of hurt. The blessing and disappointment comes from the same source.
I love God and that has never changed. I also realize the church will never change. The potential for good and bad will always be there.

Today I shall…

…try to remember to be considerate of anyone who has any time been of help to me, even though his later actions might have been hostile.

-Rabbi Abraham J. Twerski
“Growing Each Day, Adar 10" Aish.com

"Then I encountered Rabbi Twerski’s commentary for yesterday and it occurred to me that many of us have been 'throwing stones in the well from which we drank.'"

(The above quote and comment came from a blog I read - Morning Meditations. This particular post is "Throwing Stones.")

I had to realize I'd been throwing stones as well. A lot of good in me came out of attending the church or churches I once did. This is what I need to focus on regarding the past and the future. It's still a struggle as I head off to church each week but it's easier than it once was. Plus, as mentioned, I am convinced of the need for community life for everyone, including me! We need people in our lives because we are made for relationship. I know that life is not full when I delve into my isolationist tendencies. I choose to move forward rather than retreat.