Why do I find it so difficult to pour out my heart, especially in writing? But then again maybe I’m even worse at it verbally. I think I like ‘neat packages’ because I can grab a hold of them somehow. And ‘pouring out’ for me usually does not come in a neat package. Far too many tears have flowed for my liking these days. I know I have a problem with control. Even so, life has been definitely out of my control lately. But the control issue is all just an illusion on my part anyway. Who is really in control? God.
The past 4 months have been quite a transition time for me. And I’m not saying that it is now over! I still don’t know where I’m heading. Hope is a great thing and a lightening of the load – wonderful. The encouraging thing is that I feel a bit of movement, no direction but movement. Waiting, limbo or whatever you want to call it is not easy for me. (Is it easy for anyone else?) Although I must say I’ve learned a lot, mostly about myself. Some of it is still difficult to put into words. But maybe that’s for another posting.
Is there anyone out there that wants to tell me about stability?
