There is something so sweet about Saturday mornings and it's not because the breakfasts are special. Most often I have the usual - yogurt and granola. I think it's in part because I can feel the collective sigh around the area. For me there's no rush to get out of bed, the pace of the day just automatically feels slower and the coffee is even better, if that's possible!
My bird month is almost over. Next Saturday is May 1st! (Can't believe it!) There's a little twinge in my stomach - What's going to happen? What am I going to DO? But now is not the time to decide. I want to trust that the right thing(s) will come along and I will hear God say which way to go. I certainly feel blessed not to feel pressure, however, I do want the full experience of the adventure God has for me.
Saturday, April 24, 2010
Monday, April 19, 2010
"Bird Month"
Awesome day at the beach yesterday! Perhaps a little too much fun since I'm unnaturally pink/red today. It was wonderful to relax and enjoy the early summer weather, though. No regrets!
April is my "bird month" as I've dubbed it. It's in reference to the scripture Matthew 6:26. For me this means no major life decisions or purposeful intent upon a certain direction. (Not that that is what the scripture necessarily is telling us!) It's a time to pray, investigate and information gather about various possibilities. I've had one other "bird month" before in my life - Feb. 2005. I was on furlough from the mission field and my pastor declared it for me. I was in process of determining if the Lord wanted me to return to the mission field. But my pastor said it was time to let that go and just be - for a time. It was a good exercise and took a lot of pressure off of me. There have been temptations to head off in a particular direction but I've determined to wait. I don't want to get caught up in something for the wrong reasons or just out of sheer momentum. Whatever He has will still be waiting for me!
April is my "bird month" as I've dubbed it. It's in reference to the scripture Matthew 6:26. For me this means no major life decisions or purposeful intent upon a certain direction. (Not that that is what the scripture necessarily is telling us!) It's a time to pray, investigate and information gather about various possibilities. I've had one other "bird month" before in my life - Feb. 2005. I was on furlough from the mission field and my pastor declared it for me. I was in process of determining if the Lord wanted me to return to the mission field. But my pastor said it was time to let that go and just be - for a time. It was a good exercise and took a lot of pressure off of me. There have been temptations to head off in a particular direction but I've determined to wait. I don't want to get caught up in something for the wrong reasons or just out of sheer momentum. Whatever He has will still be waiting for me!
Friday, April 16, 2010
Interesting Read
"It is time for faith that fears inaction, not failure." Organic Church by Neil Cole
Thursday, April 15, 2010
New Adventures vs. The Past
Why do new adventures seem to drag our thoughts and perspective to the past? Oh, the exhilaration at first keeps everything at bay - the exhilaration of a new plan, ideas and future. But implementing those ideas, formulating that plan has caused me to remember the past. It's not that I have any regrets which I'm very thankful for but the past is not failure free! "They" say you learn more from your failures than your successes. OK. That seems reasonable, true even. Yet at the moment my failures bring doubt, perhaps not paralysis but certainly not fluid movement or momentum.
I would love to be a part of a small, healthy, balanced fellowship - do I dare say 'church' of an unconventional form. Yet as a missionary church planting didn't go exactly as I had hoped. I guess it's time to evaluate. What was good and what wasn't. God's Word does not return void. God did work and continues to in Poland. Maybe evaluation isn't what I need but just greater reliance on Him. It is amazing and sad what we/I can do 'for the Lord' without the Holy Spirit. It's not all bad but is it as effective as He could do? For me right now, I think it's important to keep the pressure off myself. Pressure even from myself only makes me 'do the effort'. I just want to walk behind the Holy Spirt as He moves and works.
I would love to be a part of a small, healthy, balanced fellowship - do I dare say 'church' of an unconventional form. Yet as a missionary church planting didn't go exactly as I had hoped. I guess it's time to evaluate. What was good and what wasn't. God's Word does not return void. God did work and continues to in Poland. Maybe evaluation isn't what I need but just greater reliance on Him. It is amazing and sad what we/I can do 'for the Lord' without the Holy Spirit. It's not all bad but is it as effective as He could do? For me right now, I think it's important to keep the pressure off myself. Pressure even from myself only makes me 'do the effort'. I just want to walk behind the Holy Spirt as He moves and works.
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
back in the saddle?
Well, It's ONLY been a little over 4 years since I've written! With that in mind, I doubt anyone will even be reading this because I dropped off the face of the earth. I didn't actually. Not even sure why I'm writing now, but why not? Perhaps this will help me process in any case.
Now I find myself in this place of great contentment. I don't have all the answers, unsure what the future holds and I think I'm ready for the adventure. My husband, Brian, and I have already passed our first anniversary and are very glad we took that first year for ourselves. No big commitments outside of ourselves, taking the time to establish our relationship. I have to say, marriage (at least to Brian) is so much better than I ever imagined! God is good!
We both feel like this is a year of adventure. (Can't believe it's already mid April.) Adventures aren't always smooth but they are exciting! First and foremost we want to be about people. They can certainly be an adventure!
I'm not going to go on and on now. I'll give some recaps of the past time and updates. I hope this becomes somewhat regular again. Time will tell.
Now I find myself in this place of great contentment. I don't have all the answers, unsure what the future holds and I think I'm ready for the adventure. My husband, Brian, and I have already passed our first anniversary and are very glad we took that first year for ourselves. No big commitments outside of ourselves, taking the time to establish our relationship. I have to say, marriage (at least to Brian) is so much better than I ever imagined! God is good!
We both feel like this is a year of adventure. (Can't believe it's already mid April.) Adventures aren't always smooth but they are exciting! First and foremost we want to be about people. They can certainly be an adventure!
I'm not going to go on and on now. I'll give some recaps of the past time and updates. I hope this becomes somewhat regular again. Time will tell.
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